on mothering

Hi friends,

I have been thinking about mothering a lot lately. Since I am really in the thick of things with young kids, I think I am going to post regularly about my thoughts on mothering.

I read this quote in a book recently. "I didn't have next to me a long-suffering mother who sacrificed herself, but a woman who was doing something for her daughter."  This struck home to me! While some moms may relate to be self-sacrificing, I just don't want my kids to think of me like that. When my kids look back on their childhood, I want them to remember a mom who had fun with them, went on adventures, read with them. I want them to remember that I was a mom who found joy and laughter in the journey. When I think about my childhood years, I remember my mom was always ready for an adventure, she was fun, happy, relaxed. She always had a million kids in her van, laughing and adventuring. She truly enjoyed motherhood and it rubbed off on us kids and everyone around her. I hope that my kids can have such happy memories of childhood!

For many years, I have been working on my energy. Sometimes I am better at it that other times. Basically, it boils down to me controlling how much energy I am going to give a situation. So, my kid spills milk, I can choose whether to freak out, or just teach him how to clean it up. Either way, it is basically going to take the same amount of time, but they have very different outcomes. If you know my kids, you know that they both have a lot of energy! Eli is almost constantly running, making noise, making messes. Sophie wakes up every morning and looks at all the calendars she has collected and lets me know what her plans are for the day. She is always planning, negotiating, scheming. Sometimes I can get really caught up in all of this and get frustrated and exhausted. One day, I was scrolling through instagram and an artist who I follow had some thoughts that really connected with me. Her instagram name is is tessaleeart and you should follow her. She has some beautiful thoughts on motherhood. Anyway, she said "they fill me up. They don't empty me. They give to me. They don't take from me." I know that our thoughts are so powerful and saying these sentences really helps to change my perspective. Thinking of my kids' energies in a positive way can change my perspective as well. Instead of thinking "My kids are so exhausting!" I try to think "Eli brings so much happiness to our home! I am so thankful his body can run and jump and play!" "Sophie is such a determined child! She is a great planner and go-getter! She is so great at taking charge and getting things done! These skills will really help her throughout her life!"

                                        
Please, tell me! What thoughts have you had on motherhood lately???!!!

love,
Em